I read that if you pour a soda into a toilet (it might just be coke, I am not sure), you can clean your toilet with it.
So, I'm thinking to myself, (which is very dangerous when I am thinking) IF I DRINK all of this soda (I am on my 13th can today), and then I have to tinkle every 15 minutes, and I am so full of soda, would the toilet still get cleaned?
Why am I drinking all of this soda?
because the water bottles are so heavy, and they are in the car.
some brainiac told me to cut the plastic, and just take a few bottles at a time into the house.
do you know how long that takes?
if you only got ONE package of water, that would be fine
but NOOO, not me. When I was checking out, Cynthia told me I bought the wrong water.
24 bottles of those 16.9 oz....
except it was the 32 bottles that were on sale.
I tell her, "forget it."
she insists - oh, ya get 8 more waters for less money.
no, I tell her.
she insists.
I go back to the water aisle, located 10 miles away and I do see the 32 bottles, all nicely packaged in plastic.
I can't lift it. no shid.
So, nobody is around.
I start yellng, "help me."
it was more like "G/D IT, WHERE IS EVERYBODY? WHY ISN'T ANYBODY HELPING ME?
Some kid shows up behind me and said he would take the water to the check-out.
I ask him, "where's your uniform?"
he says, "I'm a customer. My wife is waiting for me in the soda aisle."
omg
now Keith comes along to walk me to my car.
I just realized it now that he put the original package of 24 waters, and THE OTHER pkg of 32 bottles in my car.
56 freaking bottles of water in my car.
not in my house, where you would normally drink it.
oh no, it has to be in the car.
Here is the bottom line about drinking all of that soda - I was thinking that if you drink liquids, and it is soda, and it is supposed to clean your toilet, then I may not have to clean my toilet for like EIGHT (
FRIGGIN YEARS.
The noises I made when I tried to life the 32 pack were orgasmic.
<<moan> <scream> <ohgod> "hellllp meeee>
PASS THE BULLETS.
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