Hmmm ...
"Thing you guys gotta realize about a green coconut is that the brown coconut is on the inside of the green one. It has a green husk on it kinda like Hillary's reptilian skin."
... well then, ribit ... that "green skin" should've cushioned the blow to your webbed foot ... right???

The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted. ~ D.H. Lawrence