yes, the us has put itself in a difficult place.
but no, russia is not the hero of this story. russia permitted and even encouraged the corruption of ukraine's political system. russia indeed did invade crimea. there's no legitimacy to a hurried referendum carried out under the aegis of an occupying force even if it is possible a majority of crimeans might favour russian rule.
scotland is a better example of the process of becoming independent. take it slowly. give room for a discussion to take place.