Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.
"Yeah, teach?" he replies.
"If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.
Matt answers, "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."
"No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking," the teacher responds.
"Well, teach, I've got a question for you ... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor; one is biting her ice cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"
The teacher, a little taken aback by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."
Matt replies, "No, teach, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"
The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted. ~ D.H. Lawrence
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