Preparing for the Super Bowl
I am something of an expert in Super Bowl preparation. Have seen every one of em since AD started. First of all your gonna need Pizza and Beer and ya sneakers to make bathroom runs during commercials. Not the ones with spikes on em as they might damage the flooring. Next up ya gotta oil up the moving parts on the old recliner just in case the game goes into overtime. Asides, ya don't want that thing squeaking cause the spousal unit will think you are "UP" and she will conjur up an assignment for ya that will last til long after the game is over. "Ya can record it" she will tell ya not realizing that no matter how hard ya cheer ya can't cheer hard enough to effect the outcome of a game that is already over. (Unless you are a democrat and your talking about an election ya lost fair and square). I may come up with some more helpful suggestions like having her come in and slap ya silly about once every half hour to keep the space aliens from kidnapping you right out of your recliner.
Liberals are like a "Slinky". Totally useless, but somehow ya can't help but smile when you see one tumble down a flight of stairs!
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