It's all da rage ... even below da Mason-Dixon. 'Dis coon tore up a liquor store lookin' fer it!
‘Very intoxicated’ raccoon trashed Virginia liquor store, then passed out face-first in bathroom
http://nypost.com/2025/12/02/us-news/very-intoxicated-raccoon-trashed-virginia-liquor-store-then-passed-out-face-first-in-the-bathroom/
He was trashed!
A “very intoxicated” raccoon went on a drunken rampage inside a Virginia liquor store — then passed out face-first in the bathroom, local officials said.
The masked bandit was found snoozing in a booze-induced haze by the toilet Saturday morning after trashing the Ashland ABC Store, leaving behind a trail of broken liquor bottles, disheveled shelves, and toppled boxes, according to the Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter.
The “very intoxicated” raccoon was found snoozing on the floor after trashing the Ashland ABC Store. | Hanover County Animal Protection
“They are funny little creatures,” Samantha Martin, the animal control officer who found the raccoon, told the Associated Press.
“He fell through one of the ceiling tiles and went on a full-blown rampage, drinking everything.”
Photos from the shelter suggest the tipsy critter enjoyed a sampling of Jameson, scotch, and whiskey. | Hanover County Animal Protection
Photos from the shelter suggest the tipsy critter enjoyed a sampling of scotch and whiskey, including Jameson.
Officials said they transported the trashed panda back to the shelter to “sober up before questioning,” and later released him back into the wild.
“After a few hours of sleep and zero signs of injury (other than maybe a hangover and poor life choices), he was safely released back to the wild, hopefully having learned that breaking and entering is not the answer,” officials said in their cheeky Facebook post.
“A big shout-out to Officer Martin for handling this chaotic scene with professionalism and good humor. Just another day in the life at Hanover Animal Protection.”
The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted. ~ D.H. Lawrence
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