The Queen's Breasts
Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts in the Kingdom of Toad Suck.
Lurch, the Royal Headsman, obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death, should he try to touch them, but he had to try.
One day Lurch approached the Royal Wizard and revealed his secret desire to him.
The Wizard thought about this and said that he could arrange for Lurch to more than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause, Lurch readily agreed to the scheme.
The next day, the Wizard got a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.
Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, the Wizard informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and he advised that only the saliva of Lurch would work as the antidote to cure the itch.
The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Lurch to their chambers. The Wizard then slipped Lurch the antidote for the itching powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Lurch worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Lurch left satisfied and hailed as a hero.
Upon returning to his chamber, Lurch found the Wizard demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Lurch couldn't have cared less knowing that the Wizard could never report this matter to the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.
The next day, the Wizard slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Lurch.
The moral of the story? Don't @&%# with wizards!
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