*FIVE RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE:*
1. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the idiot's name.
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
*BONUS RULES:*
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
I think Congressmen should wear uniforms. You know, like NASCAR drivers, so we could identify their corporate sponsors!

OCU